Category: Reviews

  • ‘Don Juan DeMarco’ is about the spirit of romance

    ‘Don Juan DeMarco’ is about the spirit of romance

    Johnny Depp has a way with the ladies in 'Don Juan DeMarco'
    Johnny Depp has a way with the ladies in ‘Don Juan DeMarco’

    In most American movies leading men are not given emotional lives, they’re given emotional moments. Chiefly, they’re given tasks, even in romantic comedies — reclaim the prize, win the girl, slay the dragon. It’s the Alpha Male as hero. In this regard, the deeply-romantic comedy Don Juan DeMarco is a welcome exception.

    The film stars Johnny Depp as the title character, a patient in a mental facility who is either clinically insane, or the direct descendant of the legendary ladies man, Don Juan of Seville. Like his distant relative, DeMarco’s life revolves around romance.

    “There are only four questions of value in life,” DeMarco shares early in the film. “What is sacred? Of what is the spirit made? What is worth living for, and what is worth dying for? The answer for each is the same: only love.” It’s this wonderfully romantic notion that informs every scene in this mid-nineties gem.

    If Don Juan DeMarco came and went without much fanfare back in ‘95, there is only one explanation — sometimes the critics get it wrong.

    The film opens with the “Spanish nobleman” donning the last of his formal attire; a flowing cape, a black mask, leather gauntlets, etc. Focusing on these details, we could be in the age of gasping heroines and the dashing caballeros that crossed swords in their honor. Instead, the nobleman strides down the street of a modern metropolis. DeMarco’s voiceover explains that he’s the world’s greatest lover, he has made love to over a thousand women, has just turned twenty-one, and has chosen this night to die. His reason? A broken heart, of course. Before going bravely to his death, the dapper youth opts for one final “conquest.”

    Striding into a hotel restaurant, DeMarco approaches a woman awaiting her date; she’s been waiting for some time and welcomes the distraction.

    “I am Don Juan,” he smiles, sitting at her table.

    “And you seduce women?” she chuckles.

    “No,” he corrects politely. “I never take advantage of a woman. I give women pleasure, if they desire it. It is, of course, the greatest pleasure they will ever experience.” It’s quite a boast. But it gets her attention. Taking her hand, DeMarco draws an analogy between touching a woman’s fingers and touching her legs — rubbing the joints of the finger is like touching her knees, brushing further up the finger is like touching her thighs. When he kisses her hand at the knuckles, her eyes go sleepy with desire, and the implication is clear.

    “Every woman is a mystery to be solved,” DeMarco’s voiceover intones as the two make love in her dimly-lit hotel room. “But a woman hides nothing from a true lover.” With each image, DeMarco’s worship of the female form is clear. It’s that rare scene in American movies — a leading man focused on giving a woman pleasure, rather than using her for his. “I wonder,” DeMarco muses with a thick Castillion accent, “if the Stradivarius violin feels the same rapture as the violinist when he coaxes a single, perfect note from its heart?” With that the woman’s smiling mouth bursts open, matching the passionate cry of a lovely mariachi singer in the restaurant below.

    It’s this balance between humor and sensuality that writer-director Jeremy Leven (The Notebook) gets right from first scene to last.

    Back in the restaurant, DeMarco bows his goodbye to the woman, exits the restaurant, and tells us in voiceover, “Oh, well. Time to die.”

    Marlon Brando and Faye Dunaway in 'Don Juan DeMarco'
    Marlon Brando and Faye Dunaway in ‘Don Juan DeMarco’

    When we see DeMarco again, he’s standing on a catwalk above a giant billboard as police and onlookers gape from the street below. Enter screen legend Marlon Brando (The Godfather, Apocalypse Now) as Dr. Mickler, a local psychiatrist. In an attempt to talk the jumper down, Mickler introduces himself to DeMarco as Don Octavio de Flores, a fellow nobleman. Soon after, Mickler has DeMarco admitted to the mental hospital where he works. Despite being two and a half weeks from retirement, Mickler requests the young man’s case, seeing the troubled youth as “a helluva swan song.”

    Word of DeMarco’s presence spreads fast, and in less than 24 hours Don Juan is having an affect on half the staff at the clinic. “Officially in his hacienda,” one doctor observes, “there are more nurses on valium than patients.”
    When DeMarco is prescribed drugs to combat his delusions, the young man protests.
    “Here’s the drill,” Dr. Mickler explains to him. “You’re on what they call a ten day paper, and for those ten days they can do whatever they think is appropriate.”
    “I am not deluded,” DeMarco insists. “I am Don Juan! And if you will not medicate me for these ten days, I will prove it to you.”
    And if Mickler is unconvinced?
    “Then I will take your medication,” DeMarco swears, “and you may commit me for as long as you like.”

    With that, the stage is set for DeMarco to draw the doctor in to his tales of love and adventure. It’s a wonderful tale of childhood curiosities, adolescent longings, elicit affairs, duels to the death, and a sexual adventure in the Middle East too priceless to give away here.

    While DeMarco’s romantic tales are the obvious “meat” of the movie, the film’s greatest pleasures come from the affect the tales have on the rotund Dr. Mickler. The usually staid doctor begins picking flowers in the hospital parking lot, listening to opera, regarding his wife of thirty-two years differently, and returning more eagerly to work each day.
    “This kid is fantastico,” Mickler tells the head administrator.
    “You do intend to give him medication?”
    “If I give him medication,” Mickler protests, “I’ll never be able to get into this world of his, and it’s a wonderful world!”

    What’s difficult to convey here is just how funny Don Juan DeMarco really is without giving away the film’s sweetest pleasures. There is so much humor, one could argue the romantic comedy tips more toward comedy than romance. In truth, the film gives generously to both genres. Best of all, Don Juan DeMarco builds to an ending so sweetly magical and joyously romantic that the entire endeavor is raised to the level of fable in its final passage.

    Faye Dunaway (Network) is wonderful here in the role of Mickler’s wife, Marilyn. It’s a slight role that might have gone unnoticed without Dunaway’s considerable charm and beauty. She and Brando share an on-screen chemistry that serves the film well. Unlike Brando’s doctor, Dunaway’s Marilyn takes comfort in their unbroken, daily routines.

    “I just feel,” Mickler confesses in bed, “as though we’ve surrendered our lives to the momentum of mediocrity. I mean, what happened to all the celestial fire that used to light our way.”
    “Fires are a lot of trouble,” she tells him. “A good, steady, long glow. That does the trick over the long run.”
    “No fire,” Mickler objects, “no heat. No heat, no life! That’s the equation.”
    “What is going on?” Marilyn asks. “You’ve been acting funny lately.”
    “I’ve been treating this kid…he thinks he’s Don Juan.”
    “So, who is he, really?”
    “I don’t know,” Mickler sighs. “But he’s getting to me.”

    As the day of Dr. Mickler’s retirement draws near, facts begin to surface that throw the don’s romantic stories into question. A grandmother in Queens contradicts the young man’s claims, replacing key facts with decidedly unromantic details. It seems certain, if the grandmother is to be believed, that DeMarco is delusional. With less than 24 hours remaining to complete his diagnosis, Mickler’s convinced his charming young patient will have to be committed. Until… we won’t reveal that here.

    At its heart, Don Juan DeMarco isn’t about seduction, though there is plenty of that. It isn’t about sex, though there is that too (albeit a PG-13 brand of nookie). At its heart, Don Juan is about the spirit of romance that lives equally in all of us, regardless of age, appearance, or the length of our relationships.

    The film’s score stands out among the best of the late, great Michael Kamen (a huge loss to the industry). Equally tender and grand, Kamen’s score draws inspiration from the golden age of Hollywood. By combining a full orchestra with traditional Spanish instrumentation, Kamen set the film’s passionate tone from the very first shot of the film.

    Kamen’s score has been given its own isolated track on New Line’s DVD release. Viewing any film with an isolated soundtrack brings a composer’s every choice into high relief. Admittedly, watching the isolated track without the benefit of commentary from the composer is like watching a silent movie that’s inconsistently supported by an orchestra. Without the ability to click from musical cue to musical cue, viewers must sit through long passages of the film in silence, which I can’t imagine myself, or anyone in the general public, doing. Better, I think, to purchase the A&M recording of the soundtrack, which is still widely available. I’ve owned it since the film’s release, and its terrific.

    Other elements on the DVD include animated menu screens. In a first for this reviewer, the image driven scene selection menu features a “preview” option. Previews play in the small menu window with full audio, and are very well chosen. The DVD also contains the original stateside trailer, which seems more concerned with selling Depp as a sex object than it is with selling the film as a whole. What’s up with New Line and their trailers (see Torch Song Trilogy review)?! Assuming foreigners are more sensitive, the studio’s international trailer does a much better job of conveying the film’s romantic core.

    Also in the extra section are cast bios for Depp, Brando and Dunaway. These bios feature odd facts about the cast, like the fact that Brando lives like a recluse in a Polynesian atoll once owned by that country’s royal family. Bios of Depp and Brando include clips from other movies that both, I’m sure, are trying to forget. While Depp’s appearance in two Nightmare on Elm Street films seem quaintly cheesy today, Brando’s clip from The Island of Doctor Moreau is so embarrassing one wonders if it was chosen by someone who hated him. It comes as no surprise that all three films are New Line productions.

    The DVD also features language and subtitle options, a music video featuring a pop version of Kamen’s love theme as performed by Bryan Adams, and the option to view the film in fullscreen or widescreen formats.

  • 1974’s ‘The Taking of Pelham One Two Three’ is a smart, keen thriller

    1974’s ‘The Taking of Pelham One Two Three’ is a smart, keen thriller

    Walter Matthau plots to save the day in 1974's 'The Taking of Pelham One Two Three'
    Walter Matthau plots to save the day in 1974’s ‘The Taking of Pelham One Two Three’

    The number 6 train out of Pelham Park pulls to an unscheduled stop between stations, nesting in a cavernous tunnel below 23rd Street in Manhattan. A dignified man with a mustache and glasses wearing a wool coat and fedora sits in the conductor’s booth. He is not the conductor. As the Manhattan transit system spirals into chaos, the figure calmly retrieves the two-way radio beside him, calling command central.

    “Now listen trainmaster,” the man says with a light British accent, “Your locomotive has been hijacked by a group of heavily armed men. We are holding seventeen hostages in the first car. I am quite prepared to kill any or all of them if my demands are not met to the letter. Have I made myself quite clear?”

    The army of dispatchers and transit police go quiet with the announcement. The working-class employees sit riveted by the hijacker’s call. Doyle, the desk trainmaster, is not in the mood. “You’re out of your skull!” Doyle barks at the voice.

    “Be that as it may,” the Brit replies, “take out a pen and write down my list of demands.” So begins the set up for The Taking of Pelham One Two Three, a crowd-pleasing, edge-of-your-seat crime drama that remains as thoroughly entertaining today as it was the day of its controversial, 1974 release.

    To understand the film and the controversy that surrounded it, you have to get a picture of Manhattan in the seventies. Street level crime was rampant. Businesses were fleeing the city for the ‘burbs. The chasm between black and white New Yorkers was growing wider, setting the stage for the tragic events of Crown Heights and Howard Beach a decade later. Drugs, which had always been an element of city life, were getting harder and starting to flourish, corrupting some neighborhoods while devouring others. Forty-second Street and it’s surrounding West Side blocks were an unofficial red light district, choked with porn, pimps and the constant threat of violence. Many feared traveling after dark, and nobody — nobody — was dumb enough to walk through Central Park at night.

    In a calculated rescue attempt, Mayor John Lindsey began petitioning film companies to come to New York. The plan was to make Manhattan the new location of choice for Hollywood filmmakers. Film production meant money for the cash-strapped city and local businesses alike. Film production, Lindsey reasoned, meant a shot at returning Manhattan to the glory of its legendary heyday, if only on the big screen. Lindsey’s efforts drew nine productions to the town in 1973, including The Great Gatsby with Robert Redford and Al Pacino’s good cop drama, Serpico. It seemed New York was back on track, in the movies and in real life.

    Then came The Taking of Pelham One Two Three. Buzz on the original novel, written by best-selling author Morton Freedgood under the pseudonym John Godey, was so strong that the film rights were snatched up before the novel went to press. Pelham was a big production, featuring some of the most well-known actors of the time.

    There were just a few problems.

    The story posited New York’s subway system as vulnerable to terrorism and painted Manhattan as fertile ground for crime. Adapting the novel, screenwriter Peter Stone (1776) delivered a cast of characters so arrogant and foul-mouthed they validated the negative worldview of New Yorkers Lindsey’s campaign was meant to subvert. Others feared the film’s explicit dramatization of a subway car-jacking would provide a ready-made blueprint for a copycat crime.

    Despite the controversy, Lindsey’s city cooperated fully with the production, giving United Artists a subway tunnel in Brooklyn that hadn’t been used since the mid-40’s, a train, a platform and enough city personnel to get the job done.

    Whether you’re a collector of iconic, ‘70’s classics, hard boiled crime flicks, or simply a fan of great movies set in The Big Apple, The Taking of Pelham One Two Threeis a must have. Period. Like George Forman, I personally guarantee it!

    Freedgood’s original novel takes its title from transit code. Pelham is the station from which the hijacked car starts its run. One Two Three is a reference to the time the train pulls from that station, hence, 1:23pm. It’s a minor detail, really. WhatPelham is more concerned with is the deadly game of cat and mouse played by a handful of transit police and a ruthless band of terrorists.

    Contemporary Hollywood filmmakers obsessed with explosives and hyperactive acrobatics should take a lesson from Pelham, a film that delivers an edge-of-your-seat thrill ride without so much as an oblique camera angle. It’s a near-documentary approach that, nonetheless, manages to deliver one of the most kick-ass crime thrillers ever shot on location in Manhattan.

    As bad guys go, they don’t get much better than the heavies in Pelham. The band of identically disguised hijackers is a volatile mix of personalities. So tenuous is their union that none is trusted with so much as their compatriot’s names. Instead, their names are coded: Mr. Blue, Mr. Green, Mr. Brown, and Mr. Gray. If the color coded names sound familiar, they should. Writer-Director Quentin Tarentino paid homage to Pelham when he created his own band of identically dressed hoodlums with color-coded names in his first film, Reservoir Dogs.

    As crime films go, Pelham is uniquely amusing. It is filled with enough jokes and clever one-liners to nearly rate as comedy. But writer Stone and director Joseph Sargent (Like Something God Made) wisely play their bad guys straight. With little more than their presence, the hijackers create a tension so nerve-racking that the deaths of innocent people feel both shocking and inevitable.

    Earl Hindman, as Mr. Brown, is a genuinely disquieting presence, silent and brooding with a crazy man’s glare. Hindman would hit a career high years later on TV as Wilson, the always-obscured next door neighbor of Tim Allen on Home Improvement. Hector Elizondo (Raising Helen) nearly dominates the group as the insubordinate Mr. Gray. As the gang’s wild card, Elizondo raises the stakes throughout with his itchy trigger finger and naked contempt for Mr. Blue, the group’s leader. Martin Balsam (Cape Fear, 1962 and 1991) plays against his nice guy type as Mr. Green, the disgruntled TA worker and most reluctant terrorist. Balsam brings a sympathetic quality to his role which humanizes the others by association.

    Robert Shaw is a stone-cold criminal in 1974's 'The Taking of Pelham One Two Three'
    Robert Shaw is a stone-cold criminal in 1974’s ‘The Taking of Pelham One Two Three’

    Robert Shaw, who could chew scenery with the best of them, shows none of his broad theatricality here as Mr. Blue. Quite the contrary, his performance is a textbook case of small, telling moments. And always, there’s that implacable, Mr. Blue cool. Fresh from his last day of shooting on The Sting, Shaw proves the linchpin that holds the gang, and the film’s extended subway sequence, together. In a bit of wicked business, Mr. Blue sits in the conductor’s booth of the hijacked train patiently completing a crossword puzzle as the city scrambles above to meet his impossible demands. As the cops race to get the ransom to the hijackers, transit police officer Lieutenant Zachary Garber tries to buy the hostages more time, calling down to the train with his radio.

    For this reporter, the brightest jewel in the crown of Pelham’S many achievements is the casting of veteran comic actor Walter Matthau (Grumpy Old Men) as Lt. Garber, the cop doing his best from command central to save the lives of the hostages on the train. Matthau brings an immediate veracity to the transit workers in general, and the story as a whole. Popular ‘70’s comedian Jerry Stiller (father of Ben) and character actor Dick O’Neill are also welcome additions, giving the hard-edged New York types all the foul-mouthed attitude and quick wit the city’s residents are famous for. Considering Hollywood’s current penchant for square-jawed action heroes, it’s hard to believe there was a time when the unconventional leading man was given his hour to shine: Matthau with his wonderfully, hangdog looks, Stiller with his everyman appeal and O’Neill with his angry, bulldog delivery, help keep Pelham grounded in reality, thus elevating every defeat and victory to the level of opera.

    “How ‘bout fifteen more minutes, Pelham?” Garber asks of Mr. Blue. “A lousy fifteen minutes.”
    “Negative,” comes the answer.
    “Ten minutes, then. What difference can ten minutes make to you?”
    “Negative.”
    Below the city in the hijacked car, Mr. Green is growing nervous, knowing a hostage’s life hangs in the balance of Blue’s demands.
    “What happens,” Green asks Blue, “if they can’t make it?” “Then we do,” Blue assures him, “what we said we’d do.”

    It’s also instructive to present-day filmmakers to note that Pelham manages to rivet viewers to the action at hand without ever resorting to the overused hooks of the bad-seed student being chased down by his mentor, or loved ones in jeopardy, or good cops seeking revenge for a murdered partner or spouse. Pelham simply sets the ball rolling and imagines who would be forced to deal with the fallout. No death-defying heroics. Just a random selection of city workers doing their jobs.

    After the Vietnam War, the disillusioned movie-going public began rejecting the candy-coated artifice of Hollywood for gritty neo-realism. The more stark the better. In this way, The Taking of Pelham One Two Three was a film of its time. The cluttered transit system and its related offices featured therein are as unglamorous as their muted, dishwater paint jobs. The entire color palette of the film is a wash of soiled earth tones and the fading grays of a city filmed in the dead of winter.

    Though the film never inspired a copycat hijacking, no train in the New York City transit system has left Pelham Park at 1:23 pm since the release of the film. Why tempt fate, the logic goes? A copycat incident would happen twenty-one years later when a popcorn flick called The Money Train would inspire a copycat crime against transit workers long after the controversy surrounding The Taking of Pelham One Two Three faded into history. Ironically, Money Train, like Pelham, featured the hijacking of a New York City subway car for money.

    For soundtrack aficionados, it should be noted that Pelham features one of this reporter’s favorite themes. It’s a driving, chaotic mix of classical, jazz, and funk with a base of ethnic percussion and attitude to spare. I don’t pretend to know anything about the “chromatic pitches” or “twelve-tone methods” composer David Shire claims to have used to recreate Manhattan’s “organized chaos.” I just know that Shire’s score, with it’s washboard accents, electric guitar and organ riffs is still as in-your-face “bad” today (read: good) as a Sam Jackson tirade. Thankfully, the Retrograde Records reissue of Shire’s score is readily available, and comes with a comprehensive, 11-page booklet of liner notes.

    As DVD’s go, this MGM release is damn near naked. The only extra is the original trailer for the film, which is pretty good. There are no commentaries, no behind the scenes documentaries or actor filmographies. The latter is a particularly surprising omission considering the long and impressive list of industry credits each actor brings to the table.

    Spare as it is, the DVD does feature a widescreen version of the film, ideal for serious collectors and those of us too young to have seen the film in theaters.

  • Peter Dinklage is charming in Thomas McCarthy’s debut film, ‘The Station Agent’

    Peter Dinklage is charming in Thomas McCarthy’s debut film, ‘The Station Agent’

    Peter Dinklage and Michelle Williams in 'The Station Agent'
    Peter Dinklage and Michelle Williams in ‘The Station Agent’

    In writer/director Thomas McCarthy’s debut feature, The Station Agent, Peter Dinklage stars as Fin, a train enthusiast who inherits an abandoned station house in Newfoundland, New Jersey. Craving the good old fashioned peace and quiet that only a permanent rural retreat brings, Fin embraces his new property with a peculiarly stoic brand of relish and looks forward to a life of solitude right next to the railway.

    Now’s probably as good a time as any to mention that Fin is a dwarf, and somewhat paradoxically his diminutive stature makes him stand out in his new home. The locals just can’t help but be fascinated by this new character and there’s a rich well of humour in Dinklage’s sardonic expressions when, for example, the shopkeeper takes a souvenir snapshot while he’s trying to buy groceries.

    Fin’s polar opposite is the loud extrovert, good-intentioned but overfriendly Joe, played by Bobby Canavale. Like an enthusiastic puppy, Joe is determined to make friends with Fin, resulting in more of Dinklage’s perfectly timed sardonic expressions. This being a film, Fin is slowly won over by Joe’s clumsy attempts to make friends. But director McCarthy paces it all so perfectly, and layers it with a rich, mature sense of humour about their relationship.

    There’s an absolutely perfect cinematic moment where both men are sitting on chairs outside the station house. Fin has his feet up on a bucket. When Joe attempts to position his feet on it as well, Fin gives him a disappointed look. Joe understands and retracts his feet. It’s perfect cinema because with these simple visuals McCarthy communicates everything about the two men’s relationship, yet still entertains with touch of humor.

    The reason McCarthy is able to do this so simply and so effectively is that he gives his small cast plenty of screen time to establish their characters. This is one of those films where certain people will complain that “nothing happens”. It’s true, I suppose. Nothing blows up and no one single-handedly averts nuclear war. But all 88 minutes (very short by current standards) are devoted to the relationships between the central characters, and when done so expertly this has to be a good thing.

    Completing the trio of lonely hearts is slightly eccentric Olivia, played wonderfully by Patricia Clarkson. Clarkson is a hugely popular actress and her performance as the recently bereaved mother whose marriage is breaking up will only gain her new admirers. The problems between her and her husband are mostly just hinted at, and it’s refreshing to see such strong emotional currency being restrained rather than milked. By not explicitly revealing all her problems, McCarthy positions the viewer with Fin. We only know what he knows and it helps you to share his concern for her and his confusion about what to do.

    Olivia is the tie that initially draws the other two together. The three eventually form what can only be described as a heart-warming friendship. And while ‘heart-warming’ has become a bad word in recent years, The Station Agent isn’t heart-warming in the slushy Ron Howard sense of the word. It’s understated, and the emotions aren’t pushed right in your face. As a result, the trio’s friendship becomes genuinely and unapologetically touching.

    I will always argue that any successful drama needs a good helping of comedy to help regulate the tension (and vice versa). The Station Agent performs such a beautifully conceived balancing act between the two, the result being something that is not only very funny, but also — either despite of or because of the slightly odd characters — rings very true.

  • ‘Torch Song Trilogy’ is bawdy, quick-witted and proudly sentimental

    ‘Torch Song Trilogy’ is bawdy, quick-witted and proudly sentimental

    Harvey Fierstein in 'Torch Song Trilogy'
    Harvey Fierstein in ‘Torch Song Trilogy’

    “You know, there are easier things in this life than being a drag queen,” female impersonator Arnold Beckoff says in the opening monologue of Torch Song Trilogy. “But I ain’t got no choice. See,” he murmurs sadly, “try as I may… I just can’t walk in flats.”

    Bawdy, quick-witted and proudly sentimental, Torch Song Trilogy was the odds on favorite to be the first gay-themed motion picture to cross into mainstream (read: straight) success. Before the film was released in 1988, it tested through the roof at LA and Midwestern previews. In a business where studio execs pray for a 50% approval from such screenings, and 75% augers a hit, Torch Song was testing in the mid-90’s, with audiences saying they’d definitely recommend the film to friends.

    Execs at New Line were so enthusiastic about the film’s test scores that writer-star Harvey Fierstein was courted for a TV spin-off before the film was even released. Studios all over town began putting gay-themed projects into development based on theTorch Song buzz. New Line was hopeful. The play the film was based on had conquered Broadway, earning critical acclaim, selling out months in advance, and winning two Tony Awards (Best Actor, Best Play, 1983).

    The film seemed poised to do bigger business still.

    What turned the tide in the movie’s favor? Maybe it was the fact that it kept ‘em laughing and spared viewers any graphic sexuality; Torch Song was more about romance than sex. Maybe it was the film’s positive spin on the nuclear family. Whatever the reason, preview audiences were responding to the film, and a hit seemed guaranteed.

    So, what happened? Why did a film that had everything going for it perform like Smarty Jones at the finish line? There were many reasons. Fear of AIDS had reached a fever pitch when the film opened. Straights weren’t feeling charitable toward gays at the time. And frankly, most 80’s moviegoers just weren’t comfortable buying a ticket for a gay themed film.

    Torch Song was too far ahead of its time.

    Today, fans of the film are legion. Like myself, most discovered this little buried treasure on video, where the film has, at last, earned the respect and affection it richly deserves. Whittled down from its four-hour source material, the streamlined, two-hour Torch Song never feels cobbled together. Instead, the movie plays like a “best of” collection of the stage play’s funniest and most affecting moments. If the evidence coming out of Hollywood is any indication, Romantic Comedy is the hardest genre to master. But master it Fierstein did, creating an emotional ride that swings joyously from burlesque production numbers, to tender romance, to moments of startling heartbreak.

    If one believes the only difference between straight and gay couples is mechanics, Torch Song makes an amusing case for that argument. Though the gayness of his characters is never soft-pedaled, heterosexual couples are sure to see themselves in Fierstein’s flawed, sparring lovers.

    Some viewers might be surprised to find that Fierstein’s lead character dreams of the same things most “breeders” want: children, hearth & home, and someone to share them with. Considering the current national debate, it’s amusing to think that Torch Song’s themes of adoption and gay marriage were radical for their time, just twenty years ago.

    Driving the film is Fierstein himself, in an unguarded, stellar performance. Viewers not familiar with his name might recognize the actor’s trademark, cigarette-ravaged voice from his stints on The Simpsons, or recognize the actor as Jeff Goldblum’s panicked co-worker from Independence Day. No doubt first-time viewers of Torch Song will henceforth associate the brilliant comic actor with this, his definitive role. And for good reason.

    Fierstein plays Arnold Beckoff, a loveable, working-class lug of a female impersonator who transforms nightly into Virginia Hamn; the manish, staggeringly unattractive diva Beckoff brings to life in all her scene stealing glory. Fierstein performs Hamn’s numbers live and with great comic timing, always keeping his better half sympathetic.

    Off-stage, Beckoff is a thinly veiled stand-in for Fierstein himself. That said, it’s no wonder Beckoff feels fully drawn before the end of his very first scene. Putting on his make-up backstage, Beckoff turns to the viewer, indicating his face and grunting like a teamster. “Whadda ya think?” It’s clear he will never be a swan. “Gimme a break,” he snaps. “It’s still under construction!” It’s humor that’s gotten Beckoff through the hard times, and its humor that keeps him on his feet. Lucky for us.

    Like the best work of Billy Wilder, Woody Allen and Neil Simon, Fierstein’s script is rife with memorable exchanges, flawed characters, realistic confrontations and priceless one-liners.

    “I know you’ll find this hard to comprehend,” Beckoff explains to a co-worker who suggests a nightcap of anonymous sex with a stranger, “But I want more out of life than meeting a pretty face… and sitting down on it.”

    When Beckoff’s mother comes to SoHo to visit him, Beckoff’s adopted son, David, reaches for her bag, startling her. Mom has never met the boy, and a struggle ensues.
    “Help! Mugger!” she screams.
    “What?” the teen protests. “I’m not a mugger!”
    “Then you’re a rapist!”
    “Why would a rapist wear a three piece suit?”
    “How do I know? Maybe you’ got a wedding after!”

    Matthew Brodrick in 'Torch Song Trilogy'
    Matthew Brodrick in ‘Torch Song Trilogy’

    When Beckoff’s mother learns that David is adopted, she’s horrified. Beckoff hasn’t told her that his new son is gay.
    “Arnold,” she says, referring to Beckoff’s orientation, “Don’t you think this is bound to affect him?”
    “Ma,” Beckoff assures her, “David’s gay.” She’s speechless.
    “He’s been here less than a year!” she mumbles.
    “Ma, he came that way!”
    “Nobody comes that way!”
    Even in the middle of an argument, it’s a set up Beckoff can’t resist.

    As with all romantic comedies, music is key, and Torch Song scores on this note as well. The soundtrack features a pair of songs sung live by Beckoff’s alter-ego, and a wonderful burlesque number performed by the troupe of “ladies” at Beckoff’s job (Bertha Venation, Marina del Rey and Marsha Dymes — you gotta love it). Each queen is distinctive, with Ken Page doing a spot-on Pearl Bailey and legendary drag performer Charles Pierce shining in a role written expressly for him by Fierstein.

    Conspicuously absent from the original soundtrack album is the Ella Fitzgerald standard, “This Time the Dream’s On Me.” It’s the song that gets reprised twice in the movie, and gives the film’s final moments a heartwarming poignancy that haunts long after the final credit fades. Unfortunately, the soundtrack, a soothing blend of jazz and American Popular Standards, is no longer available.

    In addition to the wall-to-wall pleasures of Fierstein’s writing, Torch Song is made especially memorable by the performances of its leads. Brian Kerwin, who plays Ed, Beckoff’s first on-screen love, is equally funny and heartbreaking as the bi-sexual man who loves Beckoff, but can’t bring himself to come out of the closet to friends or family. Matthew Broderick’s boyish charm is used to good affect in the role of Beckoff’s long-awaited soul mate, Allen, a model and former male escort. Having played David, Beckoff’s son, in the original theatrical production, Broderick returned to appear in the film version as Fierstein’s boyfriend.

    Taking the part represented no small risk for the actor. By the time cameras rolled on Torch Song, Broderick was already a household name, with the hits War Games and Ferris Bueller’s Day Off behind him. If Broderick ever felt uncomfortable playing Allen (Fierstein, in his feature-length commentary, giddily shares that he did), there’s no proof of his discomfort here. Broderick plays his role with utter sincerity, making the unexpected turn in Allen’s story all the more bracing.

    Karen Young does a fine job as Ed’s wife, a sad-eyed waif who’s both sweetly naïve and shamelessly manipulative. Whatever happened to this actress?

    In the stage version of the trilogy, Estelle Getty played Beckoff’s mother. It was a role Fierstein wrote for her. At the time, Getty was only a part time actress, and would later find her fame on TV’s The Golden Girls. In the film version, the role of Beckoff’s mother went to veteran actress Anne Bancroft. It’s Bancroft’s flawless craft that shines brightest here. Her performance is so intense, so wonderfully naked, and so screamingly funny, it’s a wonder she didn’t win an Oscar. Caught between accepting her son and rejecting his lifestyle, Bancroft character’s frequently outraged by her son’s orientation. It’s in these scenes, when mother and son are at odds, that Torch Song delivers its most wrenching confrontations and bittersweet moments.

    Helmed by TV veteran Paul Bogart of All In The Family fame, the film’s TV-like direction works to the project’s advantage, keeping our focus squarely on the emotional lives of its characters.

    DVD extras include Fierstein’s charming, informative, feature-length commentary, trailers for other gay-themed films from New Line, and the original theatrical trailer for Torch Song. And therein lies your smoking gun; more concrete proof that the studio dropped the ball couldn’t exist.

    The trailer is a mess, uneven, unfocused, flitting from dramatic lines to comedy without rhyme or reason, neither committing to nor avoiding the film’s gay subject matter. The inclusion of Rod Stewart’s “Maggie May” feels painfully intrusive. Only a brief passage featuring the Fitzgerald ballad suggests how a smarter campaign might have posited the film as the rich, warmhearted romantic comedy it is. The final insult comes when a humorless voiceover speaks over a shot of Beckoff and his fellow drag performers taking their bows: “It’s not just about some people, it’s about all people.”

    Wow, that’s bad!

    With the mainstream success of Will & Grace and Queer Eye For The Straight Guy, a new path has been made for the rediscovery of Torch Song Trilogy on DVD by a new generation of fans. Ironically, the likes of Will & Grace would not have been possible if not for Harvey Fierstein’s original play. As Arnold Beckoff might say from his dressing room, “Ain’t that a kick in the rubber parts?”

  • ‘The Last Samurai’ in a masterful period piece

    ‘The Last Samurai’ in a masterful period piece

    Tom Cruise in 'The Last Samurai'
    Tom Cruise in ‘The Last Samurai’

    The first time I saw the trailer for The Last Samurai, I could not suppress a chuckle. Tom Cruise seemed comically larger than life, dressed-to-kill as a samurai. Here is a man who does not know his limitations, I thought. Does he realize he’s… um, not Japanese? Alright, I confess, I sided with Nicole (and her career) after the breakup. Until I heard that Ken Watanabe had received an Oscar nomination, I wasn’t even remotely interested in what seemed like another film driven by Cruise’s ego.

    Ah, but Ken Watanabe is an actor much deserving of an Oscar nomination, not to mention a win. In The Last Samurai, Watanabe plays the noble Katsumoto, leader of a radical group of Samurai. Watanabe is brilliant as Katsumoto. He quickly steals the show. He is funny, wise and lovely. It is his character that sets the tone for the entire film. The Last Samurai is, surprisingly, a twist on the quintessential “buddy” film and an action packed spiritual masterpiece.

    Meanwhile, Civil War veteran and pained alcoholic Captain Nathan Algren (Cruise) is sent to Japan to train the Emperor’s troops to defeat the samurai. Algren is rebellious against authority that includes an infamous Colonel Bagley (Tony Goldwyn). Embittered by a past experience under Bagley’s leadership, Algren is aggrieved and vividly unhappy. Cruise’s usually arrogant, pretty boy veneer is thankfully nowhere to be found. He is as sympathetic as Custer is revolting.

    The Last Samurai really begins when Algren is captured by the Samurai. After watching him fight, Watanabe finds himself drawn to Algren’s self-destructive cool and fight-till-the-death combat style. Though it would seem that Algren is there for Watanabe’s amusement, it is Algren that begins to learn something about Samurai culture and, eventually, himself while being held captive. Algren is quickly seduced by his surroundings, signing up train and fight side by side with the Samurai.

    The film is a masterful period piece. Luxurious landscapes abound with actors clothed extensively and dramatically in Japanese wardrobe at the forefront. The Last Samurai goes all out to make sure that you feel as if you’ve been transported to traditional Japan. It is easy to get lost in the epic story and dazzling landscape. The beauty of the Samurai honor code is tantalizing at a time when war is less honorable. When Cruise suits up for the last fight, it draws awe and pride… not chuckling.

    Though the trailer hints at a romance between Cruise and Taka (Koyuki), Katsumoto’s sister, the romance is as subtle as one would imagine it would be in traditional Japan. The film never draws focus away from the bond that builds slowly but surely between the two warriors, Katsumoto and Algren. Algren finds himself because Katsumoto sees something in him that Algren has long lost. These complicated characters grow, hurt and feel together before our eyes.

    The Last Samurai is a spectacular sight. It is a truly grand, wondrous larger-than-life film. It is a credit to hero epics like Braveheart that have drawn too many wannabes like the grandiose Gladiator. The Last Samurai capitalizes on its star power to entice viewers but holds their hearts by enveloping them in the stunning story of two men from different sides of the globe helping each other to find their souls in an ever-changing world that threatens their existence.

  • Jean-Jacques Annaud’s ‘Quest for Fire’ gets wonderful treatment on DVD

    Jean-Jacques Annaud’s ‘Quest for Fire’ gets wonderful treatment on DVD

    Rae Dawn Chong in 'Quest for Fire'
    Rae Dawn Chong in ‘Quest for Fire’

    What do Hellboy, a cavity search by London police, and two wooly mammoths running through suburbia have in common? They are all in some way directly connected to one of the most original motion pictures ever made — Quest for Fire (alternate title: “La Guerre du Feu”). Though practically forgotten today, Quest broke box office records at New York’s Ziegfeld and LA’s Cinerama Dome theaters when it premiered in February, ‘82, beating out the previous record-holder, Close Encounters of the Third Kind.

    Having already established himself with his Oscar-winning debut feature, Black and White in Color (Best Foreign Language Film, 1977), director Jean-Jacques Annaud enjoyed his second world-wide hit with the remarkable Quest for Fire, the director’s sophomore effort. Audiences were drawn by Annaud’s stated ambition to make the definitive prehistoric fantasy adventure. Before it opened, word was out that best-selling author and anthropologist Desmond Morris helped craft the period-specific gestures and body language seen in the film. Viewers looked forward to seeing the clever, prehistoric language created by world-famous author Anthony Burgess (A Clockwork Orange). What audiences didn’t expect was an historically-based drama that played like a thoroughly rousing adventure.

    Quest would go on to win two Cèsar Awards (Best Picture and Best Director), a BAFTA and Academy Award for make-up, The Academy of Science Fiction, Fantasy & Horror Film Award for Best International Film and many other nominations.

    Set 80,000 years in the past, Quest takes us back to a time when one thing mattered above all things to man — fire. As the opening text explains, “The tribe that possessed fire possessed life.” Without it, death was certain.

    From its opening shot, Quest draws us in, panning an unforgiving landscape to reveal a single flame winking in the distance. No sooner are we introduced to the Ulam — a clan of ragged homo sapiens encamped beside the fire — than the primitives are set upon by Neanderthals. Little match for their attackers, the surviving Ulam scatter, regrouping on a slip of land in a swamp that’s surrounded by ravenous wolves.

    Carrying what’s left of their precious fire in a crude bone lantern, our shivering ancestors see their only hope for survival dashed when the flame’s last ember dies in the boggy air. Watching the tattered humans huddle against the cold, it’s hard to imagine how such a fragile race of beings ever escaped extinction, let alone survived their first winter.

    As Ulam begin dying around him, the clan’s elder statesman pulls three men aside, instructing them to venture into the world and “find” fire, thus saving the tribe. However naïve, the first steps of the trio’s journey feels unimaginably brave.

    Before I go any further, it’s important to note that Quest is not your father’s caveman flick. If you like your prehistoric tales served with bikini-ed femfatales and square-jawed he-men, turn back now! What separates this film from cheesier efforts like Clan of the Cave Bear and One Million Years B.C. is Quest’s stab at anthropological accuracy. Accurate or imagined, the film’s details feel wholly authentic. The moment-to-moment aspects of prehistoric life are refreshingly unpleasant here. It’s a world of rotting teeth, gross meals, unglamorous animal hide tunics, and zero hygiene. Yet within this unpleasant arena, Quest manages to weave one of the most thrilling, laugh-out-loud funny, and original adventures you’re likely to see.

    Composer Philippe Sarde, with over 200 credits to his name, was at the top of his game when he scored Annaud’s film. Combining traditional African instruments with a full orchestra, Sarde evokes the glory and fragility of early man’s first days. It’s a testament to the film’s delicate telling that Sarde builds the majority of his score around a love theme; it’s a wonderful melody, alternately delicate and grand, that harkens back to the classic scores of Steiner and Gerhardt in its most passionate moments. Unfortunately, Sarde’s masterwork is no longer in print, and can only be found in its original LP format… if you’re able to dig up a collector online. A great loss, that.

    The 20th Century Fox DVD transfer is sumptuous. And for movie lovers sick of Hollywood’s see-me C.G.I., Quest is gloriously free of any special effects beyond its award-winning make-up. Shot entirely on location, Quest manages to seamlessly blend landscapes as disparate as Kenya, Scotland and Canada into a single, organic environment.

    Everett McGill shines as the trio’s uncertain leader, Noah (pronounced, NO). It’s a performance so wonderfully nuanced that it takes repeated screenings to fully appreciate the actor’s craft. Ron Pearlman (Hellboy) and Rae-Dawn Chung (Commando) made their screen debuts in the film. For Pearlman, Quest was the first in a long line of heavily made-up characters that would become his stock in trade (The Name of the Rose, Beauty & the Beast for TV). It’s Pearlman’s comic brute that nearly steals the movie. Seventeen-year-old Chung, who had never considered acting before the film, was a family friend of Annaud’s producer when the director spotted her on a beach. Soon after, Annaud cast her as the film’s pivotal character, Ika (pronounced, EE-ka). Nameer Al-Kadi, playing the smallest of the fire-seeking trio, rounds out the cast nicely, and shares some of the film’s biggest laughs with Pearlman, the two generously rotating the roles of comic and foil between them.

    Each performer is memorable, but it’s Chung’s Ika that lingers. It’s Ika, painted from head to toe, that brings to the adventure its most unexpected element — poignancy. Despite indirectly saving her from cannibals, the trio wants nothing to do with the little, blue female at first. Pleading and patient, Ika eventually joins the trio, sparking a romance with Noah.

    After a brutal assignation (the film earns its R rating!), the two develop a bond. As fate would have it, Ika’s sophistication could prove the key to the Ulam’s salvation, if only our boys can keep up. In one of many memorable scenes, a stone rolls off a hillside and bounces off Pearlman’s head. When Ika laughs spontaneously, her companions are startled, not knowing what to make of her behavior. An elliptical scene charts Ika’s influence on her companions when the foursome is finally able to share a laugh together. My only complaint with the DVD came when Ika cries in her village — a heartbreaking moment in theaters. In this scene, Chung’s tears are all but lost in this small screen format, despite the DVD’s high resolution.

    Over 3 hours of extras include a feature-length commentary by Annaud with the director walking us through the ordeal of getting Quest made. Annaud also recounts how he was subjected to a humiliating cavity search in London when police grew suspicious of his frequent flights between continents during preproduction, and how two of the elephants used in the woolly mammoth sequence saw each other in costume for the first time and ran terrified from their tents… and into the streets of suburban Manchester.

    A second commentary track features actors Pearlman and Chung with producer Michael Gruskoff. Though Annaud claims in his commentary not to remember a single complaint from his actors, Pearlman and Chung roll out a laundry list of issues they had — and expressed — during the brutal production. Pearlman and McGill, we’re told, still suffer from the affects of the frostbite they contracted on the production.

    Annaud also narrates a series of production stills, storyboards, location pics and publicity images in the scrapbook portion of the extras. Frustratingly, there is no option to “play all,” so viewers are forced to toggle through these categories individually. A Making-of doc is narrated with such ham by the late Orson Wells, one wonders if he took any aspect of the project seriously. For all of their sincerity, Desmond Morris and Anthony Burgess just come off as silly when they posit their contributions as “how it would have been.” I can only hope my memory’s that good when I’m 80,000 years old.

    Annaud’s latest film, Two Brothers, opens June 25th.

  • ‘X2: X-Men United’ is better than the original

    ‘X2: X-Men United’ is better than the original

    The mutants are together again, with some new members, in 'X2: X-Men United'
    The mutants are together again, with some new members, in ‘X2: X-Men United’

    It’s rare that a sequel proves to outdo the original, but X2 does pull it off with flying colors. This is chiefly because it does everything that a sequel is supposed to do: Build on original, expand the story, move it forward and make it different.

    Now, doing a comic book film is challenging, but at the same time you are playing in a field that’s already been laid out. The characters have built in stories and arcs from being featured in comics for decades.

    For example, much of what we’re learning about olverine (Hugh Jackman) was spelled out a long time ago in the comic books. Much of what’s displayed about Nightcrawler (Alan Cummings) has been long developed in the comics. The story of Jean Grey (Famke Janssen) has been spelled out in the comics.

    Of course, you don’t want to simply retell stories that have already been told, and X-Men 2: X-Men Uniteddoesn’t do that exactly. But, elements of the story were mined from the comic series.

    The story begins with the introduction of Nightcrawler as he infiltrates the White House in an attempt to kill the President of the United States. We then learn that Wolverine has reached a dead end in his search for his forgotten past, and returns to Dr. Xavier’s School for the Gifted. Jean Grey is suffering from mysterious attacks concerning her telepathic powers, Magneto (Ian McKellen) is still in prison, and a military man (Brian Cox) requests that the President allow him to take down Xavier’s school which he believes is the base of operations for a secret group of mutants.

    There are subplots and other elements which I’m not cover there, because it would probably take me this entire review to explain all that goes on in this story. What impresses me so much about this film — as well as the first one — is how they manage to fit so much into it. The X-Men is unlike most comic book series because it does surround one superhero in particular. With this tale you have a group of heroes, all with unique powers and stories.

    The strength with the X-Men movies are the actors. These films have managed to merge so many amazing talents that they alone life the film above the par.

    Hugh Jackman as Wolverine in 'X2: X-Men United'
    Hugh Jackman as Wolverine in ‘X2: X-Men United’

    Like the first film, Wolverine plays a major part in the story, and the character’s struggle with his own past and his place in the world is still a struggle for him. Hugh Jackman embodies the comic bad boy with perfection. And while his hair still looks ridiculous, they did manage to tame it a bit in a few scenes.

    Rogue, played wonderfully by Anna Paquin, is also included but is not caught up in the central story as in the first. Her story does allow for more development of Iceman (Shawn Ashmore), who is only seen briefly in the first film. The two share a love relationship, but must find a way to overcome Rogue’s inability to come into physical contact with another person without sucking all their energy (kind of making lip-locking a bit of a challenge).

    Of course, the heart and soul of these movies are the two elder statesmen, Patrick Stewart as leader of the X-Men, Dr. Xavier; and Ian McKellen as the evil Magneto. These two help anchor the film, lifting the quality of these films by their mere presence.

    I was very excited by the idea that they decided to bring in one of the comic bookcharacters that I’ve always thought was one of the most interesting — after Wolverine — which was Nightcrawler. I loved his portrayal, which was beautifully brought to life by Alan Cummings. Cummings is a strong actor who is generally found playing creepy, sleazy characters. It was refreshing to see him playing someone who probably has more reason than the others to dislike and distrust humans, but instead feels for them.

    Brian Singer has really managed to deliver two outstanding comic book films, a feat not matched since Superman and its sequel, Superman II (we’ll see in June if Raimi can do it with Spiderman). He did what many thought was impossible, taking a crew of superheroes and building excellent stories that managed to capture the themes of the comic.

    The X-Men 2: X-Men United DVD includes a series of documentaries, many of which focusing on Nightcrawler and his “bamfing” — the term used for his teleportation power, which I thought was a truly beautiful effect. There are also a series of deleted scenes, most of which are pretty lame, to be honest. They don’t add much, and some are simply alternate versions of scenes from the movie that so subtle that you don’t necessarily notice the difference from how it appeared in the film.

    The sexy Rebecca Romijn-Stamos is back in blue (and 'nude') as Mystique in 'X2: X-Men United'
    The sexy Rebecca Romijn-Stamos is back in blue (and ‘nude’) as Mystique in ‘X2: X-Men United’

    The audio commentary featuring Singer and his cinematopher, Newton Thomas Sigel, was also kind of dry. Some commentaries offer funny stories from filming, or insight into how the story developed and so forth. Those are generally entertaining. Then there are the commentaries that do little more than offer technical commentary, which is not terribly interesting to listen to and is generally devoid of humor.

    Sigel does make several jokes throughout the commentary, but most are either ignored and go over the head of Singer. I was actually expecting a good commentary here, but was sorely disappointed. The only interesting thing was that Singer mentioned his stint and brief appearance in Star Trek: Nemesis, adding that he was a big Trek fan.

    Perhaps Paramount should have listened to that commentary, because then maybe they’d ask him to do the next film. With the way he’s helmed the X-Men movies, I am confident he’d be able to put together a film that would be stars above any of the last few outings.

    In the end, I found X-Men 2 to be a terrific addition to this comic book franchise, and actually got me excited about the prospects for a third film.

  • ‘The Day After Tomorrow’ makes the end of the world as we know it a fun adventure

    ‘The Day After Tomorrow’ makes the end of the world as we know it a fun adventure

    Emmy Rossum is rescued by Jake Gyllenhaal in 'The Day After Tomorrow'
    Emmy Rossum is rescued by Jake Gyllenhaal in ‘The Day After Tomorrow’

    The traditional elements of all disaster films consist of two parts action, two parts effects and varying parts of cheesiness. The Day After Tomorrow features all of these things, with a bit of preachy environmentalism to spice things up a bit.

    Decades of polluting the environment catches up to the human race when the next great ice age is triggered by changing weather patterns. As a result, three massive snow storms develop in the North Pole and grow bigger and bigger as they make their way towards the equator. Raining massive hail stones and dropping several dozen feet of snow on the ground, the entire climate of the planet begins to change.

    Scientist Jack Hall (Dennis Quaid) repeatedly attempts to warn the Vice President of the United States that things are going to get worse, but he is repeatedly ignored. As New York suffers a massive flood – followed by a deep freeze – Hall learns that his son, Sam (Jake Gyllenhaal) is trapped in the city that never sleeps. He then decides to fight the freezing temperatures and journey to NYC from Washington, D.C. to retrieve his son, who holds up in the New York Public Library with a few friends.

    Of course, there are a few subplots, such as a love story featuring Sam and the girl he longs for (Emmy Rossum), but for the most part this film basically consists of one action/disaster scene after another.

    For me, the most disturbing portion of the film is the flooding of New York City. Not just because I live in that great city, but because it mirrored a nightmare I’ve had on several occasions. Watching the massive, ten to fifteen story wave move between buildings and fill the streets made me sit a little straighter in my seat. The effects are really outstanding, as cars are swept away by the rushing water.

    The Earth freezes over in environmental disaster flick, 'The Day After Tomorrow'
    The Earth freezes over in environmental disaster flick, ‘The Day After Tomorrow’

    Quaid does a great job as the over-the-top heroic scientist, and Gyllenhaal is fine as his jilted son. But, these kinds of films are not about the performances. It’s about the effects. There is no character development to get in the way of the pseudo science and environmentalism.

    It’s just a good old fashioned popcorn movie.

    The only real issue I had with the effects was when Quaid and his companion pass the snowed in Statue of Liberty. Now, I’ve never actually been to the statue, but the size ratio between the people and the statue itself seemed completely off. The statue is made out to be much smaller than it actually is, at least that’s the way it looked.

    Roland Emmerich has offered up yet another slam-bam disaster flick that is all about the disaster and very little about the characters. He clearly has a thing for making scientists his chief heroes, who are always these larger than life types who are perfect in almost every sense: smart, handsome and daring. Yet, at the same time, they always put their work before their life.

    In Independence Day, Jeff Goldblum’s character let his work interfere with his marriage. In Stargate, it’s James Spader who is the single-minded geek who dedicates himself to his work with no interest in having a real life. Godzilla plays differently on this trend, but has the same result. Matthew Brodrick is the dedicated scientist, but the woman he loves leaves him in favor of her career, instead of him leaving her for the same reason.

    Lastly, the movie also delivers a rather transparent punchline on the Bush administration. The Vice President clearly looks like our real VP, Dick Cheney. Also, be on the look out for one particular moment between the movie’s Vice President and the President. The audience laughed for almost a full minute, but I don’t want to reveal it here. It’s a precious moment that you could almost see happening between Bush and Cheney.

    Don’t worry so much about the science of The Day After Tomorrow. Whether or not it could really happen, it’s still fun to watch.

  • ‘Duplex’ is a horrible film starring Ben Stiller and Drew Barrymore

    ‘Duplex’ is a horrible film starring Ben Stiller and Drew Barrymore

    Ben Stiller and Drew Barrymore star in 'Duplex'
    Ben Stiller and Drew Barrymore star in ‘Duplex’

    Anyone who has ever seen a film that Danny DeVito has directed, produced, written or starred in knows that DeVito has a certain brand of humor. It’s a bit off-putting, a bit different and sometimes completely off the mark. His critically panned Death to Smoochy was all these things with the exception that it was exceptionally entertaining. Duplex is all these things and nothing else.

    Duplex is a horrible film starring Ben Stiller and Drew Barrymore as Alex and Emma, a married couple lacking any chemistry that buys into a Brooklyn duplex furnished with a rent-controlled tenant. The tenant, Mrs. Connelly, is a sweet old lady who lives in the second floor apartment.

    However, the “sweet” old lady is actually a double-dealing fiend who promises to make their lives a living hell.

    Ben Stiller and Drew Barrymore in 'Duplex'
    Ben Stiller and Drew Barrymore in ‘Duplex’

    Alex is a writer working at home on a book with a strict deadline. Mrs. Connelly drives him crazy by making him run all sorts of useless errands that never seem to end. He is at the mercy of Mrs. Connelly’s whims despite his better judgment.

    It’s hard to sympathize with Alex. Ben Stiller’s neurotic portrayal is downright irksome. Though his temper is cooler, his portrayal brings back memories of the crazy, two-faced date he once played on Friends.

    Drew Barrymore is sickly sweet as Emma, who has no sympathy for Alex either until she’s at Mrs. Connelly’s mercy herself. Barrymore offers but a wisp of the usual energy with which she invigorates her characters. Her character’s greatest joy seems to be expensive decorative art. In the end, Emma, who is quite ingratiating and vapid, comes off nothing more than a decorative piece for Alex’s character.

    Duplex is strikingly painful to watch. The complete chaos that ensues is anything but amusing. Alex and Emma’s attempts to kill off Mrs. Connelly should be highdark comedy, but instead only make the film seem more twisted, depraved and oh, yea, BORING! By the time the twist at the end comes along, you’ve already lost interest.

    Avoid Duplex at all costs!

    The DVD features deleted scenes and a behind-the-scenes look at the film. It also offers you the luxury of enjoying the truly terrible film in a full-screen or wide-screen format. Woopty-frickin’ doo!

  • ‘Looney Tunes: Back in Action’ is fun for the kiddies

    ‘Looney Tunes: Back in Action’ is fun for the kiddies

    Brendan Fraser and Jenna Elfman join Daffy Duck and Bugs Bunny for 'Looney Tunes: Back in Action'
    Brendan Fraser and Jenna Elfman join Daffy Duck and Bugs Bunny for ‘Looney Tunes: Back in Action’

    Looney Tunes: Back in Action preys upon our deep-rooted childhood love of good ole Bugs Bunny, Daffy Duck and all their harebrained rivals in what would otherwise be a silly, lackluster film. Back in Actiontakes us behind-the-scenes on the Warner Bros. lot to enjoy a world where cartoons and humans attempt to live together in relative harmony. And unlike Space Jam, the stars of this film are the animated bunch while the humans follow their lead.

    Leading the cast of humans are Jenna Elfman and Brendan Fraser as Kate and DJ. She’s a WB studio executive who is canned after handing Daffy a pink slip. Her mission is to recover the elusive duck, get back her job and include him in the latest Bugs Bunny flick. DJ Drake is a buff hunk who finds out his father is a super spy just in time to help save him and the world (with Daffy’s help) from a crazed ACME bigwig. Both Elfman and Fraser are uncharacteristically subdued in the film because they defer to the bunny and the duck, enjoying the most mischievous lines of the film.

    Even ACME has had to take dangerous lengths to survive in this economy. Kate, DJ, Daffy and Bugs are reeled into an ACME mastermind’s plot to turn the entire world into monkeys. As monkeys, everyone be forced into free labor to create the best ACME products, then having been turned back to humans, they will purchase all the same ACME products they labored over as monkeys. Egad!

    Timothy Dalton joins Back in Action to draw big laughs (from adults) as Damien Drake, DJ’s Bond-esque father, proving that he makes a fine spy, though a stale James Bond. Joan Cusask makes a quick appearance as his Q-like counterpart handling all the cool super spy gadgets. Damien Drake, while tied to train tracks, is held hostage by a wicked Steve Martin, unsurprisingly over-the-top as the monkey-maker, in one of his worst roles ever. Martin’s role could easily have been played by a cartoon. Clued into this fact, Martin overacts in a way that is truly villainous.

    Okay, enough background. This film is really about the toons, not the non-toony characters. A lunch where an animated Shaggy and Scooby Doo threaten Scooby Doo’s Matthew Lillard for disgracing them in the live action film leaves no question about who the bosses are in this film. WB and Looney Tunes characters make impressive appearances alongside cameos by human actors throughout the film.

    Bugs Bunny, always cool under pressure, and Daffy Duck, the ying to his yang, steal the show mostly by poking fun at the adults and each other throughout the film. You know the drill. The hotter Daffy gets under the collar, the cooler Bugs gets! These two had their shtick downpat long before Owen Wilson and Ben Stiller ever knew what a shtick was.

    The fun for adults is in rediscovering these slightly more hip versions of Bugs and Daffy. Perhaps they were always that hip, yet, another piece of knowledge we were forced to chuck along the road to adulthood. Bugs and Daffy are positively sharp, banging out witty lines and playing off each other like far less animated actors. Though, a brawny Fraser and a silly and sweet Elfman were so obviously placed in this film to keep the adults from running out of the theaters, they can hardly compete with more experienced actors like Bugs and Daffy.

    Back in Action is as fast-paced and madcap as any Looney Tunes cartoon, only bigger, longer and uncut! Besides being a regular barrel of laughs that gives all the Looney Tunes their due, Back in Action also offers spectacularly loud animated and live action special effects. An enthusiastic picture for adults and children alike, Back in Action is enjoyable for all who have ever loved the Looney Tunes bunch.

    The DVD is home to a wide variety of special features that are as funny and zany as the film. Commentary by Bugs Bunny and Daffy Duck is available on almost all of them. A “Behind the Tunes” featurette offers a set tour with Bugs and Daffy. “Bang Crash Boom” features a look at “the rabbit and duck perspective on the special effects”. An alternate opening and ending plus a slew of deleted scenes, some more hilarious than others can be found in “Looney Tunes Out of Action: Best Scenes You’ve Never Seen.” Most of the cuts were scenes that built up a romance between Kate and DJ. With a new Loony Tunes short, DVD-ROM features and a special piece starring Yosemite Sam, the DVD is as eager to please as the film.