Category: Reviews

  • ‘That’s My Boy’ is an Adam Sandler movie that doesnt suck

    Adam Sandler in 'That's My Boy'
    Adam Sandler in ‘That’s My Boy’

    “Donny Berger” is an 8th grade boy who is as the Van Halen song says, “hot for teacher.”  Teacher happens to be “Mary McGarricle” (Eva Amurri Martino) and after a proposition from Donny in the hallway, she sentences him to a month in detention as punishment.  But in detention she seduces him and their torrid affair goes on unchecked until they are discovered in a very public coupling.

    She goes to trial where her unwillingness to repent or show remorse, added to the burgeoning baby bump pushing out her prison dress causes the judge to do two things.  The judge sentences her to 30 years in prison and awards custody of the unborn child to Donny’s father after it is born.  But, once Donny turns 18, he will be awarded custody and responsibility for the child.

    This makes Donny an instant celebrity and he spends the next 20 some years capitalizing on his celebrity to support himself, even selling his life story to a producer who creates a made for TV movie (Alan Thicke and Ian Ziering play Donny’s Dad and Donny in the TV movie we get to peek at).  But when all is said and done, not only is the adult Donny (Adam Sandler) broke, he also owes some $43,000 in back taxes and he has a choice.  Pay up by Tuesday (it’s Memorial Day weekend), or else go directly to prison for three years.  With $28 in his pockets, his initial action is to be $20 on a huge longshot to win a race, and then he heads over to his favorite strip club to drink, oogle and ponder.

    Adam Sandler and Andy Samberg star in 'That’s My Boy'
    Adam Sandler and Andy Samberg star in ‘That’s My Boy’

    He then sees a photo of his now grown son (Andy Samberg) on the cover of a magazine showing that Todd is about to marry Jamie (Leighton Meester) as the expensive and exclusive home of Todd’s boss.  Now when he was born, Todd was named something else by his father, but as the magazine article spells out, apparently Todd has re-written his biography to change his name, and kill off his parents, who he claims were killed in an explosion when he was nine.  One of Donny’s stripper friends suggests that he approach his son and ask him for the money, but Donny doesn’t like that idea.

    So he tries to borrow the money from his old buddy Vanilla Ice (playing himself), but he claims not to have it.  Since he’s working at an ice rink frying chicken nuggets, his claim of poverty seems realistic.  So Donny next approaches TV host Randall Morgan (sports-talk radio host Dan Patrick in a great performance as a sleazy TV host) who decides that filming a reunion of Donny, son, and the son’s mother in her prison would be worth $50,000.  This sends Donny to the home of Todd’s boss to get Todd to agree to come visit his mother in prison.

    What happens once Todd encounters his father is partly told in the film’s trailers, but fortunately some of the funnier moments are not spoiled in those trailers and I won’t spoil them here.  Suffice it to say that some of the funniest moments in the film come from this moment forward, as Donny encounters Todd’s future brother-in-law, a very gung-ho Marine (Ventimiglia), the future in-laws, Todd’s boss (Tony Orlando) and most definitely, the mother of that boss.

    That’s My Boy is loaded with penises, breasts, drugs, booze, and humor using all of these things.  There’s a stripper in a “halo” securing her broken neck who pole dances and is later viewed doing something even more R-rated.  There’s a woman who launched into an adjective/insult laden tirade at Donny in a setting he isn’t used to that is followed by an even more surprising annoucement.  Surprises abound, as many things end up not being what they appear to be.

    I predict Adam Sandler will never make a film that generate wide, critical acclaim and leads to multiple Oscars. But that’s not the kind of movie we should expect from him and those with whom he regularly collaborates. This is one of their better, funnier efforts and that makes it a worthwhile choice to view.

  • ‘Prometheus’ is an ‘Alien’ prequel trying to be something else

    Michael Fassbender in 'Prometheus'
    Michael Fassbender in ‘Prometheus’

    An alien being stands on what appears to be Earth as he watches his ship leave.  We then watch as he is consumed by something, that results in his DNA being seeded into the water, ostensibly leaving the genetic footprint that ultimately leads to the evolution of man.

    “Dr. Elizabeth Shaw” (Noomi Rapace) and “Charlie Holloway” (Logan Marshall-Green), in 2089, are exploring ancient cultures and find an oddity.  Maps of the exact same patterns in the stars, among completely disconnected peoples.  There’s no way this information could have passed from one group to another, and the last finding is really old, some 35,000 years old in fact.

    Four years later, we see a gigantic vessel travelling through outer space, its humanoid crew kept in stasis while they are monitored and cared for by the human-looking android, “David” (Michael Fassbender). Give director Ridley Scott and/or the screenwriters credit for using possibly the best film ever made as a learning tool for David.

    A mysterious Engineer in 'Prometheus'
    A mysterious Engineer in ‘Prometheus’

    When the ship nears its destination, the mission commander, “Meredith Vickers” (Charlize Theron) is first to be awakened.  Once she’s fully awake she instructs David to get the rest of the crew up.  After they are all awake, they are informed why they are there, and who hired them as they view a video from “Peter Weyland” (Guy Pearce), the aged leader of the Weyland Corporation.  Apparently this is one great big company he heads, as it spent $1 trillion to put this ship together and launch it toward its destination.  Weyland gives his speech and then turns over the mission explanation to Dr. Shaw and Mr. Holloway, who explain that their findings have been interpreted to be an invitation from the “engineers” to come and find them.  The “engineers” are credited with creating humans and Shaw and Holloway want to meet and question them.  But mission director Vickers orders them to avoid direct contact.

    They land near what is clearly an artificial structure and a small team goes to explore it.  But before they can complete their survey, a very bad storm hits and they have to rush back to the ship for safety.  Except that two of them had apparently headed back early, but gotten lost within the structure and those two have no safe way to get back.  Milburn and Fifield are trapped within the structure and have a confrontation with what awaits doesn’t go well for either of them.

    What happens from here I will leave to viewers to discover themselves.

    Noomi Rapace in 'Prometheus'
    Noomi Rapace in ‘Prometheus’

    When Prometheus was originally envisioned, it was to be a prequel to Alien, which Scott directed in 1979.  Somewhere along the way supposedly the plans changed and the script was rewritten.

    Folks, if it walks like a duck, quacks like a duck and smells like a duck, then dammit, it is a duck.

    The same ship from Alien is shown.  The Weyland Corporation is in the Alien films. The appearance and characteristics of the aliens the humans come into contact with in this film are remarkably like the aliens from that film franchise.  If people want to delude themselves into thinking this isn’t a prequel, that’s their prerogative, but in my mind that is exactly what it is.

    But that doesn’t make it a bad film.

    It has strong special effects, more than adequate acting performances, particularly from Fassbender and Rapace.  The viewer will be on the edge of their seat most of the way and as far as sci-fi/fantasy/horror films go, it’s a more than just decent effort.

    If there is a criticism to be offered, it’s that the best parts of the film are the early parts, and rather than get better as it goes along, it tends to be a little less good later on in the story than when it begins.  But it is still very watchable and enjoyable.

  • ‘Peace, Love and Misunderstanding’ fails to deliver on its promise

    Jane Fonda stars in 'Peace, Love and Misunderstanding'
    Jane Fonda stars in ‘Peace, Love and Misunderstanding’

    Diane (Catherine Keener) has two kids, one in college and one soon to be there as well, a successful law practice and a husband.  As she is preparing for a dinner party, her husband (Kyle MacLachlan) informs her that he wants a divorce, now that the kids are older.  He is packing to depart after the dinner is over when she informs him that she’s taking their kids up to her mother’s house and he informs her that they will be doing what he wants when she returns.

    Mother’s house is an old place near that famous town of Woodstock, where Grace (Jane Fonda) lives and has done so without contact from Diane for 20 years.  Chickens wander in and out of the house, and according to Zoe (Elizabeth Olsen), the older of the two kids, the place “reeks of pot”.  Turns out that Grace sold pot and that was one way she made ends meet, but hopefully she isn’t doing that now.

    Grace is clearly still living in the 60s in mindset, if not actuality.  She organizes and takes part in protests against the war.  Yes, she smokes pot.  She is involved with local music festivals.  She holds ceremonies to honor the Goddess that are for women only when the moon is full.  Her life is as wild as her untamed locks and she loves it that way.  To her, it’s impossible to believe that she raised such an “uptight” daughter and she pokes and prods Diane to loosen up a bit.  She had a dream telling her that Diane was coming and why, and she seems unsurprised when informed of the impending divorce.

    Zoe is smart, well-read, and looking for a love that is essentially her twin, but in the body of a man.  She finds some of what she wants in the local butcher, Cole (Chace Crawford), but considering she’s a vegetarian, she’s going to have to look past the nature and cruelty of his chosen profession to see just how much of herself she may find within him.

    Her brother Jake (Nat Wolff) sees life through the lens of the video camera that seems surgically attached to his hand, and in the form of the film he is always making, although no one has ever seen one of his films (that will change).  He too is going to encounter romance in Woodstock.

    So will Diane, in the form of Jude (Jeffrey Dean Morgan), a local carpenter who is also a musician and who has a special relationship with Grace.  A relationship that will become the root of a problem later on.

    If it all sounds so contrived, that’s because it is.  In reality, Peace, Love and Misunderstanding features a family from the city going to have all three of its members finding romance literally within a few dozen hours of fleeing their urban homes?  The answer is an obvious no, but here in this universe, where Grace bonded with Bob Dylan across the stage at Woodstock, and where she can remember the order of songs the Grateful Dead played (not a tough trick, since she names only three of the five numbers in their set that was shortened by equipment problems) at Woodstock.

    We ultimately discover what went on between Jude and Grace, Cole discovers how Zoe felt about a butcher at first glance, and we learn the deep, dark secret that kept mother and daughter apart for 20 years, and it still felt a bit contrived.

    Peace, Love and Misunderstanding is a film that had a lot of potential, and a story that could have gone wonderful places, but instead doesn’t deliver on its promise.  It’s still a good effort, and features particuarly strong performances from Fonda, Olsen and Keener.  It delivers laughs, but some of them may not have been intentional or sought in the place where they came.

  • ‘Moonrise Kingdom’ marks Wes Anderson’s return to brilliance

    Bill Murray, Frances McDormand, Edward Norton, and Bruce Willis in 'Moonrise Kingdom'
    Bill Murray, Frances McDormand, Edward Norton, and Bruce Willis in ‘Moonrise Kingdom’

    On a small island, in 1965, a young boy who is a member of the Khakhi Scouts of North America, “Sam” (Jared Gilman) is found missing from his tent during breakfast.  He has cut a neat hole in the side of his tent that he covered with a piece of paper, and dug a tunnel to escape from the confines of the Khakhi Scout’s Fort Lebannon.  A search is quickly organized by “Scout Master Ward” (Edward Norton), who immediately contacts the island’s head cop “Capt Sharp” (Bruce Willis).

    Unbeknown to the searchers, Sam is not the only one who has gone missing.  “Suzy” (Kara Hayword)is the daughter of “Mr. Bishop” (Bill Murray) and “Mrs. Bishop” (Frances McDormand), who live in a house on the island somewhat removed from the scout camp.  They are both lawyers and raising several children of whom Suzy is the oldest.  Suzy has borrowed her brother’s record player and left him a note, promising to return it within ten days.

    Bruce Willis (c.), Edward Norton and Tilda Swinton co-star in 'Moonrise Kingdom'
    Bruce Willis (c.), Edward Norton and Tilda Swinton co-star in ‘Moonrise Kingdom’

    As Moonrise Kingdom unfolds, we find out a number of things.  Sam and Suzy first met the prior summer when he was with his scout unit, camped on the island, and he went to a musical put on by a group in the church.  Suzy was a member of the cast and they stayed in touch afterwards via what we refer to today as “snail mail”.  They made a plan to escape together.  We also learn that Sam is an orphan, lives in a foster home and his foster parents have had enough of the problems he causes and will not take him back.  This means that when Sam is finally located, the woman who is known as “Social Services” (the brilliant Tilda Swinton who does her best with a very limited, limiting role) will have to send him to a horrid place.

    The journey that Sam and Suzy undertake in Moonrise Kingdom, sometimes while chased, sometimes while being aided by those who chased them, is the adventure of a lifetime for two who are still so young.  Love, fear, longing, fulfillment, the gamut of feelings and emotions they experience as they try to find a life that is just theirs simply amazes.  The two youngsters who play these roles are either talented beyond their years, or were being directed by someone who knows how to get the most from everyone who wanders within range of their camera’s lens.

    Moonrise Kingdom’s famous cast members are also strong, particularly Norton in a role where he finds himself questioning what and who he thinks he is.  The writing of Wes Anderson and Roman Coppola takes the viewer along for the ride, engaging them with the story and the players throughout.  Few films manage to get me to refrain from checking the time on my watch at least once, but Moonrise Kingdom did just that.

  • ‘Snow White and the Huntsman’ is a dark re-telling of a fairy tale

    Charlize Theron in 'Snow White and the Huntsman'
    Charlize Theron in ‘Snow White and the Huntsman’

    Purists will recall that there was a huntsman in the original version of the Snow White fairy tale.

    When Snow White was a young girl, and the magic mirror informed the queen that she was no longer the fairest in the land, she ordered a huntsman to take the young Snow White into the forest, kill her and bring back her lungs and liver as proof she was dead.

    But in the latest reimagination of the fairy tale, Snow White and the Huntsman, the tale is greatly altered.

    Once the good queen has died, “Ravenna” (Charlize Theron) appears before the King after he and his forces have vanquished a faux fighting force, as a trussed prisoner.  He falls in love with her and quickly marries her.  On their wedding night, she takes his life and installs herself as Queen by opening the castle gate and allowing the forces led by her brother to come in and conquer.  The King’s daughter, the young Snow White attempts to escape but she is captured and locked away in a castle tower.

    Years later, as Ravenna’s beauty has faded, and she has restored it magically by literally sucking the beauty from young girls from aound the kingdom, the mirror informs her that the only way to stop the cycle of fading beauty once and for all is to take the heart of Snow White (Kristen Stewart).  She sends her faithful brother to get the prisoner, but she finds a way to lock him inside of her cell and makes good her escape, into the Dark Forest.

    Kristen Stewart and Chris Hemsworth co-star in 'Snow White and the Huntsman'
    Kristen Stewart and Chris Hemsworth co-star in ‘Snow White and the Huntsman’

    The angry and frustrated Queen orders that someone who knows the Dark Forest well be found to hunt down and bring back Snow White.  A hunstman (Chris Hemsworth) is found who spends most of his time drowning his sorrows with liquor, lamenting the loss of his own wife.  He knows the Dark Forest and without knowing who it is he is to recover, he sets out to find her.

    But once he does, he chooses not to bring her back, but to help her.  Along the way they encounter dwarves, although they aren’t mining anything any more, they are petty thieves.  They don’t have cute Disney names either.  But they are plucky, entertaining, and once they discover who this girl is, swear loyalty to her.

    Now the struggle is to get Snow White to the castle of the Duke, where there are forces to try to wrest control of the kingdom from Ravenna.  Yes, there’s a poisoned apple, and a kiss, and most of the other things you would expect from this fairy tale, even if we’re being shown a revised story, where Snow White becomes a warrior princess, complete with sword and armor.  For only she can bring death to the evil Ravenna.

    Snow White and the Huntsman is dark.  The Dark Forest is filled with death and seems to literally suck the life and the good out of those who wander into it.  Ravenna is a perfectly evil character, brought to life with a strong performance by Theron.  Stewart is more than adequate as Snow White, although Twilight fans will see echoes of “Bella Swan” if they choose to look for them within the story arc of Snow White.

    Another actress would not have evoked those responses, even with the same story elements.  But that’s not Stewart’s fault and she has her moments.

    Hemsworth is good, as usual, in action-based roles that don’t require too much else.  I suspect he could deliver in other roles and look forward to hopefully getting the chance to see him in one some day.

    There are moments that drag, in particular the final shot which goes on much longer than required.  But the action that is there is good, and the special effects and the forest scenes are just amazing.

  • ‘The Intouchables’ is filmmaking at its finest

    Omar Sy and Francois Cluzet in 'The Intouchables'
    Omar Sy and Francois Cluzet in ‘The Intouchables’

    “Based on a true story.”

    Whenever a film starts with this as part of the opening credits, they might as well say “we’ve changed at least one major element of the true story our movie is based on.”

    Fortunately, this time that change doesn’t alter how wonderful and inspiring The Intouchables is.

    Best described as a feel-good dramatic comedy, The Intouchables is the story of Philippe (Cluzet) who is a wealthy man, but is a quadraplegic (tetraplegic if you prefer) who lives in a lovely mansion with his teen daughter, several servants, but being his physical caretaker is a position no one has lasted at for very long.

    It is also the story of Driss (Sy), who just spent six months in prison, and has no interest in actually getting the job as caretaker.  He is only there because he needs three signatures on his form saying he’s applied for and turned down positions in order to get his welfare benefit.  Tired of waiting, when someone else’s turn comes, he storms to the front of the line and enters the room where Philippe and his assistant Magalie (Fleurot) are conducting the interviews.  Philippe refuses to sign the paper, telling Driss to leave it and to return the following morning at 9 a.m., to get it.  Although he’s already late in turning in the paper, Driss has no choice and leaves.  When he returns home, for the first time in six months, he manages to get in a bath before being given the boot by his aunt.

    Omar Sy (l.) and Francois Cluzet co-star in 'The Intouchables'
    Omar Sy (l.) and Francois Cluzet co-star in ‘The Intouchables’

    He returns to the mansion of Philippe the following morning and to his surprise, Philippe’s other assistant, Yvonee (Ny) starts showing him around and explaining his duties.  He only wants the signature at first, but when he sees the size of the room and private bath that come with the job, he decides he can take it.  At least for a little while.

    Driss is not trained to be a caretaker, but he is strong and a fast learner.  Of things he wants to learn.  He grudgingly agrees to dress Philippe, even in garments he feels are inappropriate for a male, but when it comes to helping Philippe deal with a particular bodily function, he refuses.  “I’m not emptying the ass of a guy I don’t know.  Or even a guy I do know.  I don’t empty anyone’s ass on principle.”

    Clearly he’s not the ideal employee in most people’s minds.  He flirts shamelessly and relentlessly with Magalie.  He pours very hot water on Philippe’s legs in an experiment to see if he really is without feeling below the waist.  He goes out of his way to piss off Philippe’s daughter, who isn’t happy with much of anything anyway.  But when he sees the neighbor blocking the driveway as he is about to take Philippe out in Philippe’s sports car, his solution for convincing that neighbor to never again block this space convinces Philippe that he’s made the right hire.

    This film took only 9 weeks to become the most successful French film ever, without the benefit of U.S. box office, amassing over $300 million in receipts before opening here.  Better still, thanks to the involvement of the real Philippe Pozzo di Borgo, 5% of the film’s profits are going to a French charity that helps invalids.

    Okay, so what was that one big change from the “true story” to the film version.  In the real story, it was a North African, an Arab, and not a Senaglese, not a Black that the real Philippe hired.  But that change doesn’t impact the way the film managed to capture how the men truly bonded.  I won’t tell you more about that, other than to say that they remain close, to this very day.  Oh, and the film doesn’t explain how Philippe was injured.  But if you saw the trailer, you saw he and Driss doing the very thing that put Philippe into that wheelchair.

    But don’t let charitable reasons or success be why you choose to go see The Intouchables.  It’s one of the best films out thus far this year and worthy of the investment of time and money.

  • ‘Polisse’ takes hard look at child sex crimes and does it well

    Maiwenn stars, co-writes and directs 'Polisse'
    Maiwenn stars, co-writes and directs ‘Polisse’

    Here in the U.S., some may have become a little “dulled” to the problem of cops handling sex crimes, particularly those involving children, thanks to 13 seasons (thus far) of Law and Order:  SVU.  But French director/writer/actress Maiwenn (you might have missed her in Leon: The Professional if you blinked) shows us that for the detectives in the Child Protective Unit (CPU) in Paris, sex crimes involving kids is not something for the faint of heart.

    It looks and feels like a documentary, but Polisse was scripted by Maiwenn and Emanuelle Bercot, and Maiwenn plays the professional photographer hired by the police department to document the unit’s activities for a book.  She isn’t certain just how to take the detectives and their attitude at first.  She tries disguising her good looks to get taken more seriously but Fred (rapper Joeystarr) sees through this instantly, although he doesn’t let her know that for some time.  He, like every cop in the unit, has a story of his own, although we don’t get to see every cop’s individual story in detail.  There isn’t enough time in the film’s 2 hours and 7 minutes.

    Fred is married, willing to fool around, but claims he wants to work things out with his wife.  He has a child he adores, and he takes his business life very seriously.  This is a common theme among cops who work child sex crimes, as the victims tug at their heartstrings almost every time.  When you see a little girl sitting across the room from the grandfather who is accused of molesting her, and she’s calling him a liar, you can’t help but be moved.

    The film’s most stirring scene involves a mother and son who aren’t victims of anything except becoming homeless.  She shows up at the CPU wanting to give her son to them so he will have a bed to sleep in and food to eat because she’s no longer capable of providing those things for him.  The cops try everything under the sun to keep them together.

    Iris (Marina Fois) is partnered with Nadine (Karen Virad) and Iris is always telling Nadine what she should do, about her problems with her husband, her work, what she does when she’s not working and so on.  You can see the pot is going to boil over here, the only question becomes when.  And what demons torture Iris to be so hateful of men.

    Apparently in her mind, men being unfaithful is all about them thinking with their “equipment” (not her word), while women cheating are not nearly as bad, because they are doing it due to feelings in their mind and not because of an itch at the crotch.

    We see a wide variety of suspects being interrogated about their alleged offenses, including one where the cops are told to take it easy on him.  “I have connections” he said during the interrogation and apparently that’s true.  While we hear a lot about abuse and sex crimes involving kids, thankfully we don’t watch much of it going on.  One sequence that is bound to make you laugh involves a girl whose phone was taken from her and the demands that were placed on her to get it back.  Even the cops themselves were laughing out loud at that one.

    Polisse is a hard look at a serious subject, in spite of making you laugh in a very few places.  It’s a strong effort.

  • ‘Men in Black 3’ is… better than ‘Men in Black 2’

    Josh Brolin and Will Smith in 'Men in Black 3'
    Josh Brolin and Will Smith in ‘Men in Black 3’

    The singer “Meatloaf” was prophetic long ago, when he wrote a song that is now a perfect description of the MIB franchise.  The song “Two Out Of Three Ain’t Bad” is an almost perfect description of this franchise.  The original Men in Black was great, Men in Black 3 was great, and Men in Black 2 is probably best just ignored and forgotten.

    To review the past, in the original film Agent K (Tommy Lee Jones) recruits a New York detective who becomes Agent J (Will Smith) after he somehow manages the almost superhuman achievement of running down an alien known as a cephalopod.  The two team up, save the planet in the original, save the universe in the awful sequel and now here they are together again.

    This time they are talking about the eulogy that K must deliver for the recently deceased head of the Men in Black, Agent Zed (portrayed by Rip Torn in the first two films) at his upcoming funeral.  But before that happens, a prisoner escapes from the maximum security prison on the moon.  This prisoner, Boris “The Animal” is one bad dude.  He shoots sharpened “spikes” from either palm when he has two arms (one was shot off by Agent K when he was originally arrested).  He has the other ’super’ attributes such alien threats have, super strength, speed, endurance and so on.  Boris (Jemaine Clement) makes his escape with help from his girlfriend (Nicole Scherzinger of “Pussycat Dolls” fame).  Boris has a plan.  He’s going to go into the past and kill Agent K before K shoots off his arm, and thusly Boris’ people can conquer the Earth.

    Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith are together again in 'Men in Black 3'
    Tommy Lee Jones and Will Smith are together again in ‘Men in Black 3’

    We meet Agent O (Emma Thompson) at the service for Zed and she is now in charge of MIB.  So when Agent J checks in the following morning, she’s the one who tells him that Agent K has been dead for 40 years, but thanks to a clue in J’s recent food compulsions, O becomes aware of a temporal shift (time-travel).  The only way to fix the problem is for Agent J to go into the past before Boris kills Agent K and save K.

    They refer to the method of travelling through time as a “time jump” for a reason.  But once J is in the past and is able to find K, he discovers that the Agent K he knew isn’t the K of 1969.  Josh Brolin is a dead-ringer appearance and speech-wise for the older version portrayed by Tommy Lee Jones, but something is different.  J even asks, several times, “what happened to you?”  The same, wise answer is repeated each time J asks the question.

    There’s an interesting specimen of a race that is aware of all possible permutations of the timeline based on the ever-changing sequences of events.  His name is Griffin and he’s by far the most interesting alien we’ve seen thus far in the MiB franchise.  If there is a 4th entry, I hope they find a way to bring him back.  He’s a lot more fun than the worms, or the tiny aliens in the locker in MIB 2 who worship J in a “God-like” manner.

    Men in Black 3 is a lot like the first entry in the franchise.  Slick special effects, impossible physical confrontations between humans and aliens that shouldn’t be possible, but happen in a way that you find plausible.  Sonnenfeld is blessed because the chemistry between the original stars is nearly identical to that between J and the Agent K of 1969.  There are some nice homages to the era, including a reference to the “Miracle Mets” who won the World Series that year.  If you want to nitpick, the appearance of the moon in the sky on the night before the lunar mission launch is wrong, but even though I knew that, it wasn’t a factor.

    MiB 3 is good enough to justify a 4th entry in the franchise and my only hope is that it doesn’t take a protracted period to get it done.

  • ‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting’ is fun… if not laugh out loud funny

    The men of 'What to Expect When You're Expecting'
    The men of ‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting’

    Get ready for the latest ensemble film featuring notable actors all sharing the same screen.

    It’s the popular trend in Hollywood these days, but What to Expect When You’re Expecting is actually not directed by Gary Marshall.

    “Wendy” (Elizabeth Banks) and “Gary” (Ben Falcone) are an interesting couple.  He’s a dentist, she’s a breast-feeding advocate who owns her own store catering to breast-feeding mothers and she’s just written a children’s book on the subject.

    So focused are they on getting pregnant, her smart-phone is set to go off when she’s ovulating.  When it does, no matter what the couple’s other obligations might be, they’re going to try to get pregnant that minute.

    Eventually, they succeed.  However, Gary is living in the shadow of his father “Ramsey” (Dennis Quaid), a legendary race car driver with the obligatory trophy wife “Skyler” (Brooklyn Decker) who is 30 or so years younger than he.

    Ramsey has been one-upping Gary all of Gary’s life and the announcement that he’s going to make Ramsey a grandfather is no different.  See, Ramsey and Skyler have an announcement of their own.  She’s also pregnant.  With twins!  One-upped again, Gary is not happy at this turn of events.

    “Jules” (Cameron Diaz) hosts her own TV weight-loss program and also happens to be appearing on a celebrity dance contest show.  She and her partner “Evan” (Matthew Morrison) are about to do their final dance and hopefully win the season-long contest.

    She looked a little green before coming out on-stage and after the dance is over, she and her partner win.  She is handed the trophy, and promptly barfs into it.  “I hope she’s not pregnant” the host ad-libs, but apparently her affair with Evan has left her in exactly that state.

    Matthew Morrison and Cameron Diaz co-star in 'What to Expect When You’re Expecting'
    Matthew Morrison and Cameron Diaz co-star in ‘What to Expect When You’re Expecting’

    Gary frequents a food truck (did we mention most of this takes place in Atlanta?) that’s owned and operated by “Marco” (Chace Crawford), whose food truck competition includes the rig owned by “Rosie” (Anna Kendrick) and naturally not only is Gary the son of Ramsey, Rosie is the cousin of Ramsey’s wife Skyler.  Marco and Rosie will have their own adventures in the world of pregnancy although things will not go as well as they might have.

    “Holly” (Jennifer Lopez) is a photographer who shoots baby portraits on the side when she’s not at her day job at an aquarium, diving into the tanks in scuba gear to take photos of the marine creatures that live there.  She’s spent all of the 401(k) money of her husband Alex on unsuccessful in vitro fertilization attempts and now she wants to buy a house and adopt a child from Ethopia.

    Of course she sets all that in motion, not knowing that budgetary constraints are going to cost her that day job at the aquarium.  She sends Alex to “the boys” to prepare him for his impending fatherhood.

    The boys are a group of four fathers of young children, including Chris Rock and they share their experiences and promise not to talk about what they discuss with outsiders, and not to judge.  Some of the best humor within the film comes from this group’s interactions with one another, Alex and their friend Davis, who puts the N and the other letters in narcissistic.  Davis will get his own surprise from a trip he took.

    All of these people and all of the major events in their lives intertwine.  Jules ends up in Atlanta because Gary was a guest on her program at one point and she’s there to film a follow-up.  Her pregnancy is so advanced that when she collapses during filming of that sequence with Gary, she’s advised to remain in Atlanta and give birth there.  All three of the pregnant women will give birth on the same day that Holly and Alex will formally adopt their child in Ethopia.

    If this sounds contrived, it is.  But this film manages to make you laugh and at points, make you think.  Wendy is chosen to speak to a crowd at an expo about pregnancy and she delivers a spot-on, ad-lib talk that goes viral on YouTube.  The characters manage to grow and have story arcs, even if they aren’t brilliant in their performances.  They are all better than good and Lopez in particular manages to show off that great potential she has and doesn’t deliver on most of the time.  The roll on your floor belly laughing of a Bridesmaids isn’t here, but you will laugh, titter and enjoy yourself.

  • ‘Battleship’ requires that you check your brain at the box office

    Booklyn Decker in 'Battleship'
    Booklyn Decker in ‘Battleship’

    Battleship deserves two ratings but only one can be chosen.  So I’m spelling out the two ratings here.  For action-adventure lovers who don’t know much about the military in general and the Navy in specific, and who aren’t bothered by bad science or logic flaws in a movie, the rating is definitely four stars.  On the other hand, if you fall into one or both of those groups mentioned above, score this as only two stars.

    Battleship opens in 2005 when scientists have discovered the existence of other planets in our galaxy that are similar to Earth.  That similiarity being that they aren’t either too close to the star they orbit and are too hot to support life, or are too far from that star and too cold to support life.  This results in a communications array and a satellite in orbit around the Earth being used to beam a signal in the direction of one of these planets.

    This takes place as Alex Hopper (Taylor Kitsch) is celebrating his birthday in a bar with his older brother Stone (Alexander Skarsgård), who is an officer in the U.S. Navy.  A beautiful blonde comes into the bar and Alex makes a wish for her when he blows out his candle.  He walks up to the woman whose name is Samantha Shane (Brooklyn Decker) just as the bartender is telling her the kitchen is closed and she can’t have the very specific food item she’s asked for.  Alex gets nowhere with her at first, because she is focused on food, so he promises to get exactly what she wants if she will just give him five minutes.

    The bartender won’t cooperate and the nearby convenience store has just closed as Alex walks up.  So he gets inventive and decides to break into the store through the roof and score the required food item.  Sadly his plans go awry and just as he’s running up to the bar with that item in his hands, he’s tased by chasing police officers.  Twice.  After he gets released, Alex gets an earful of lecture from his brother, who also tells him that his future is now set.  He’s going to join the Navy.

    Fast forward to 2010.  Alex is now a lieutenant serving as weapons officer aboard the John Paul Jones, an Arleigh Burke class destroyer.  His ship and the ship his brother commands are taking part in a “war game” that involves some 14 nations, including the Japanese.  There is a big soccer game and both Alex and Stone are on the Navy team taking on the Japanese team.  Things don’t go well for Alex and they get worse when Japanese Self-Defense Force  “Captain Nagata” (Tadanobu Asano) he scuffled with during the game gets into a much bigger fight aboard the USS Missouri.  We’re referring to the WWII era battleship that now serves as a museum at Naval Station Pearl Harbor, where Pacific Fleet Commander Admiral Shane (Liam Neeson) has just given a speech about the upcoming war games.  After the fight, he tells Alex that his career in the Navy is probably over.

    But the war game is interrupted by the arrival of five alien spacecraft, four of which plunge into the Pacific not far from the war gaming location.  The fifth hit an orbiting satellite and crash-landed in Hong Kong, causing massive damage.  The war game force sends the John Paul Jones and two other ships to investigate, but the aliens erect an impenetrable force field around the Hawaiian Islands, cutting the three ships off from the rest of the force and then fire on and destroy two of the three approaching ships.  The Jones is hit and the captain and other senior officers are killed, leaving Lieutenant Alex Stone in command.  He orders the ship to rescue survivors from the Japanese ship that was with them that was sunk, which stops the aliens from attacking it.

    Aliens invade Earth in 'Battleship'
    Aliens invade Earth in ‘Battleship’

    Meanwhile, Samantha (now Alex’s girlfriend) is a physical therapist, taking her patient for a hike in the mountains.   They are hiking near the communications array, in order for him to get more comfortable with his two artificial legs.  The actor performing this particular role as retired “Lt. Col Mick Canales” is an real Army Colonel, Gregory D. Gadson, who lost both of his legs to a roadside bomb in Iraq in 2007.  The aliens land at the array and begin taking control, killing all of the scientists except “Cal Zapata” (Hamish Linklater).  Zapata helps out by going back into the lab and grabbing an instrument that allows him to put them in touch with the John Paul Jones in hopes the ship can destroy the array.  The aliens are planning to use the array to “phone home” for reinforcements.

    Meanwhile, Captain Nagata  has found a way for the John Paul Jones to ’track’ the aliens, even though the ship’s Aegis system is down.  His method involves using something he claims his Navy has been doing for two decades to track U.S. ship movements without their knowledge.  It allows them to engage the alien ships.  It is also discovered that the aliens wear helmets to protect themselves from exposure to the sun, which they apparently can’t handle.  This becomes a plotpoint as the story develops.

    Sam reaches Alex aboard the John Paul Jones and warns him of what must be done, but even though he’s managed to destroy some of the alien ships, they used their incredible weapons to sink it.  So, he and Capt Nagata and the other survivors of the Jones hightail it to the USS Missouri and enlist the help of the WWII veterans who maintain the ship as a museum.  He plans to sail the battleship out and take out the rest of the aliens and then destroy the array.

    Like I said earlier, if you’re an action-adventure fan and you like big explosions, big special effects and don’t care much about the reality of stuff, you’ll fully enjoyBattleship.  What follows is why it is not such a great film for those who know about military, the Navy and science ’stuff’.  Feel free to stop reading here.

    Because he’s made out to be such a slacker, one has to wonder if Alex Stone ever graduated from a college or university.  Even if he had, the idea that he’d get into Navy Officer Candidate School with an arrest record for breaking and entering is absurd.  It requires serious suspension of disbelief to swallow the notion that his arrest and subsequent tasering didn’t result in the conviction that would scuttle any Naval career before it began.  It also boggles the mind that if he was as bad an officer as Admiral Shane makes him out to be, that he’d have been promoted to full Lieutenant and given a billet as Weapons Officer aboard a destroyer after only five years.  The errors they make at the end involving his rank and how he is awarded a decoration can be blamed on whoever the military technical advisor on this film not doing a proper job.  The science is bad for reasons not worth getting into except that the idea that a message that was beamed out into space only five year earlier would result in an alien visit is silly due to the distances involved.

    I’m a fan of Peter Berg.  There are a lot of people who will enjoy this movie.  I’m just not one of them.  Maybe my experience was impacted by the choice of song to play over the closing credits.  I love Credence Clearwater Revival and have since their music was new.  But “Fortunate Son” is all about the Vietnam War and how only the sons of the less fortunate men were forced to go and fight.  Alex Hopper may have had his arm twisted to get him to go into the Navy, but he wasn’t drafted.  It wasn’t a time of war, protest and when the “fortunate sons” got to stay home, safe.